I’ve had several responses to the February blog on forgiveness. While I knew this was a challenge, I am now even more aware of how difficult this can be.
It seems that the more we try to engage with others on social media, in the office or with our family and friends, we constantly seem to be challenged with forgiveness. I say it’s a challenge because while I strongly believe it comes down to a personal choice, it’s still not easy.
Questions such as “How do I let go of the past?” “I can forgive, but I will NEVER forget?” “They hurt me so bad, and they have never ever considered how I felt!” and the list goes on for some of the responses. Here are some things to consider:
1) How do you feel reliving the hurt?
2) Explain how holding on to the past is enabling you?
3) How can you help others forgive if you are holding on to unforgiveness?
Ask yourself these questions. They require some thought and may be provoking. None of us wants to be miserable, well at least I do not. None of us wants to be stuck while others are looking forward to new and exciting things. There are some choices and decisions we need to make to move towards living a whole and productive life, and it begins with forgiveness.
As a matter of fact, maybe I have put the cart before the horse here. Maybe we have to go inside and ask ourselves some questions about who we are.
I had to do this when I faced a very tough situation in forgiving someone. In a nutshell, here was the scenario: I had a “friend” who I loved very much. We talked, laughed, ate together. I helped this friend out in their down times financially, drives back and forth, food, you name it! A situation occurred, and while I had been there for this friend at their lowest moments when my turn came, they were nowhere to be found. They distanced them self as if they never knew me and I cannot tell you how it hurt.
Even as I write this the emotions were truly hurtful. Was I angry? Of course. Did I cry? Absolutely. How did I move on?
I decided that if this person was truly my friend they would one day reach out and hopefully, I would be in a position to hear their heart. To this day it has not happened. Am I angry? No. Have I forgiven them? Yes. It was not an overnight thing, but I had to! I had to move forward. They obviously had chosen to do the same.
We have never had a discussion to this day, and I’m not sure if it will happen, but I do know that other people have come into my life to help me to see that it is not worth “holding people or anyone” in your heart. As the infamous Disney movie Frozen! said, “let it go” and move forward. The world is big. There is much to do, and I cannot be the best me by holding on to the past.
When Jesus’ disciples asked him to teach them how to pray, he taught them: “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”.
This was not just a by the way thought, but it was important that they become masters of forgiveness. Why? Because Jesus’ mandate in coming to the earth was to do just this – teach us how to forgive. That was the major part of his focus in coming to earth. He loved us so much that He was willing to die for us to forgive us for everything we had ever done.
Can I tell you how powerful this is to me!! No one ever loved me to the point they would die for me. And really, that’s what forgiveness is, dying to ourselves, our selfishness, our injustice or wrong to someone else.
As we forgive, God will forgive us. If God is not at the top of your mind concerning forgiveness, that’s cool. The bottom line is freedom is found in forgiveness. Pray. Ask God to help you. Write a letter and mail it. See how it feels to put it on paper.
Whatever you decide, know that you can be better, do better and go further when you are not carrying the weight of unforgiveness.
Keep moving forward!
Comments are closed.